I exist behind a guise

Crushed beneath professional hair

Cannot breathe inside this suit

The one I swore I’d never wear

They were the worst days of my life

Yet I’m back inside in that cell

The one I thought I had escaped

The one that I always called hell

 

The things we do to pay the bills

Can make us strangers to ourselves

If only I could see me now

But I have become someone else

 

In my bathroom there’s a mirror

But staring back at me

Unrecognizable reflection

Pseudo identity

I plaster on my daily smile

The one the world expects

I turn away and close the door

My tie a noose around my neck

 

I hear the words fall from my throat

Saying things I don’t believe

Same old stories I was told

The ones from which I had been freed

Until I had masters to please

Bosses I’m forced to obey

The evil’s always so banal

When normalised as just another day

 

 

The things we do to pay the bills

Would make our younger selves blush red

If only I could see me now

But the me I was is dead

 

 

In my bathroom there’s a mirror

But staring back at me

Unrecognizable reflection

Pseudo identity

I plaster on my daily smile

The one the world expects

I turn away and close the door

My tie a noose around my neck

 

Life – 

binding me, 

hiding me, 

holding me prisoner, 

entwining me

 

Now I need, 

to break free, 

now I need to begin finding me

 

Finding me