Terrified, I clambered over ancient ruins

Rushing sights

Other people wait a lifetime just to see

Counting down the days

I took photographs 

And wished for home

Always thinking of tomorrow, 

I miss out on today

 

I will look back on this fondly

Even if now I am crippled by fear

Retrospect: the only joy I’ll ever see

When your own mind is your worst enemy

 

I miss the live show of the best days of my life 

But catch up with them later, on demand

Viewed from a safe distance

I confront anxiety with its false narrative

But in the amnesia of tomorrow

The lesson fades

 

I will look back on this fondly

Even if now I am crippled by fear

Retrospect: the only joy I’ll ever see

When my own mind is my worst enemy

 

That sinking feeling in my stomach instead of butterflies

Instead of looking forward I begin to catastrophize 

Wherever I am I am always locked up trapped inside my head

My fingers reach and brush against the key

This does not have to be my destiny

 

The airplane is hot with expectation

people breathing out 

Summer hopes into a flying metal box

Reminding us there are some laws of nature 

We can overcome

Even when they seem to be so permanent  

We can overcome